IC: Backdated to night of mega clusterfuck fight

[thekingsgambit]

[In one of the hospital beds, a confused ex-emperor is gradually coming to, blinking amid the poor lighting and grasping his side as he tries to sit up a little too fast. The skin around one underside of his jaw appears slightly swollen and darker than usual. Other than that, the only thing that stands out is the strained look of thought on his face as he tries to sort through the afternoon's events.]



((Note, with the exception of the Black Knights, threads are not occurring at the same time.))

Comments

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

You would not have known. Anyway, you are here now... I am glad, Kamui. Though the circumstances could be better.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[reaches for one of Lelouch's hands tentatively, ready to pull back if Lelouch reacts negatively at all]

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Something wounded flashes through his eyes at the motion, all too familiar, but he doesn't try to stop him this time.]

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[takes the hand between both of his]

…I should have been here.

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Carefully reaches over to set his other hand on one of Kamui's, ignoring the sharp sting in his side from the position.]

Kamui... I need you to do something for me, something very important.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

…?

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Lowers voice and meets Kamui's eyes]

Stop blaming yourself for this. The last thing I wanted to do was see you hurt. I need you to understand right now is when I truly need you, and you have not let me down. You did nothing wrong. Do you understand?

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[was close to tears but…stares at Lelouch for a long moment before he shuts his eyes, taking a breath]

…Yes, Lelouch.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[his gaze is clear when he opens his eyes again-- clear and strong]

I'm sorry, you shouldn't be the one comforting me.

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

As long as we both feel better at some point, it is all right, is it not?

[Attempts a lame chuckle after that.]

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

…

…Aaa…

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Drops the smile and sighs softly]

... Do you believe the future is pre-written, Kamui? That what happens here will have no impact on what happens in our own worlds?

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

The…future…

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Catches that tension immediately]

Ah, never mind... I was thinking out loud.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[shakes his head]

I think…what happens here would impact…our own worlds. But only if…we are able to remember it.

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Nods and continues]

People sometimes recall once they return, but there is no way of knowing what they remember back in their original world...

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

…

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Shakes head]

I suppose it would not hurt to hope for otherwise though.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

But if we can't remember about here once we go back… At least there isn't the pain of missing someone we'll never see again.

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

Everyone loses people important to them, Kamui; life cannot be predicted. Would you rather lose memories of those people entirely, even the good ones, if it meant the bad parts would go away?

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

[flinches]

That's… That's not fair.

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

It never is. But if life were easy, we would not get the same experience from it. It is the difference between being alive and living.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

…

[thekingsgambit.livejournal.com]

[Laughs in his humorless way.]

It was something I used to tell myself as a child. It has always been that way for me.

[emocalypse.livejournal.com]

…Oh.