[crack] Bad boys bad boys watcha gonna do
Jun. 10th, 2007 08:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thekingsgambitI don't know if this is truly canon but it's referenced in the Ashford chronicles so why not add it to the mix.
I always say if I've ever seen a serious anime do crack right and spectacularly and in ways that make WTF nowhere near accurate enough, it's Geass. The Newtype special gives us some rare quality time between Lelouch, Suzaku and Kallen. Seriously these three need to spend more time together for it is hilarious. Lelouch and Suzaku are still stupid for each other, Lelouch more so with his not quite hero worship. Lelouch in general wins the award in this one for sounding most ridiculous, but he makes up for it with some unrivaled Kallen taunting. She really needs to kick him in the balls one of these days. And hey I admit it, as manic as this thing was, the end did get its obligatory AWWWW. Also, Lelouch going "Me? Wrong?" is so damn arrogant; I'm dying here. XD
Moral of this special: Fuck you, Neo. We all know Suzaku is THE ONE!
Sound Episode NewType Special -- The Third Reason
*Translations by Celiss at GameFAQs.*
For clarification, italicized sentences in Lelouch's parts signify internal monologue.
*Gunshot; shrieks*
Bank Robber A: Don't anybody move!
Bank Robber B: Everyone put your hands on your head and get down on the floor.
Bank Robber A: Do as you're told or else!
Lelouch: Tawdry bank robbers, straight out of an unimaginative drawing. Normally this is where I snort and turn off the TV, but not this time. Why, you ask? Well...
Kallen: *girly shriek*
Suzaku: Kallen!!
*Bank robber removes the safety on the gun*
Bank Robber A: Any of you try anything funny and I'll put a hole through the girlie's head!
Lelouch: This is all real, and we're part of it.
Bank Robber B: Looks like they understand we mean business. Don't worry, it'll all be over soon -- if you'll just be smart and do what's in your best interests.
Lelouch: There are two criminals. The pompous one happens to be the boss and has a rifle. The stupid-looking henchman has a pistol and now has Kallen under custody. Nothing I can't handle by using the Geass -- my power to order anyone and everyone -- but to do it without either Suzaku or Kallen realizing may prove to be difficult...
Pompous boss: I'll head to the vaults in the back. Watch the hostages.
Stupid-looking henchman: Got it, Boss.
Lelouch: Shall I contact the Black Knights...? If I remember correctly, there should be an armed *cell in area D7. Not the most elegant of methods, but...
(T/N: *Cell is the the official term used for subdivisions of the Black Knights)
Suzaku: Stop! Let go of her!
Kallen: Suzaku!?
Lelouch: ...You idiot!
Suzaku: I'll be your hostage. She's weak, she isn't up to this.
Lelouch: Oh no, I think she's fairly tough.
Suzaku: Aren't you ashamed of yourself, holding a lady hostage?
Stupid-looking henchman: Oh? You're an Eleven. If you're Japanese, lend us a hand! Them Buriki bastards got their money by exploiting us!
Suzaku: Even so, that doesn't justify a bank robbery!
Stupid-looking henchman: Shut up! We have the Black Knights backing us!
Suzaku: Eh!?
Lelouch: Oh? The Black Knights, huh.
Kallen: Don't be absurd. The Black Knights are different from the likes of you!
Stupid-looking henchman: What you say!?
Kallen: Taking a woman hostage... The Black Knights-- Zero would never do such a thing!
(T/N: Too bad -- He did in episode 19. Though I suppose Kallen was happy then because it looked like he did it to have her back)
Stupid-looking henchman: Shut up, *Buriki whore!!
(T/N: He doesn't actually use the term "whore" -- he uses the term "woman" in an insulting way)
*Kallen gets hit*
Kallen: *girly shriek #2*
Suzaku: Kallen!!
Lelouch: Oh dear. I guess it can't be helped.
*Lelouch gets up*
Suzaku: Lelouch...?
Stupid-looking henchman: Oi, that student there, don't get up without my orders!
Lelouch: Shut up. I'm the one giving the orders here.
*Sound of footsteps*
Stupid-looking henchman: Stay where you are! Any nearer and I shoot the girl!
Lelouch: As you wish. It's not like that *woman is my girlfriend or anything.
Kallen: Wha---!? *low hiss* Le~louch!!
Stupid-looking henchman: Are you stupid? I can shoot you, too.
Lelouch: There are three reasons for your downfall.
Stupid-looking henchman: HAH?
Lelouch: The first reason -- believing that that woman has any real worth as a hostage.
Kallen: *angry noise*
Lelouch: The second -- somehow getting it in your heads that you are the only ones with weapons.
Stupid-looking henchman: Hah? Ain't no way a student's got a weapon on him.
Lelouch: Is that so? What if we both came here for the exact same reason?
Stupid-looking henchman: Wha--
Lelouch: Go on, shoot me -- if you'd like to experience first-hand the power of the C4-type plastic bomb I have in my pocket, that is.
Stupid-looking henchman: Th-that's a bluff!
Lelouch: Then I dare you to search my pocket.
Stupid-looking henchman: S-stay where you are! Come any nearer and I shoot!
Lelouch: I just thought I'd let you hear it for yourself... the ticking of the timer on the bomb.
Stupid-looking henchman: What!?
Lelouch: You should be able to hear it any second now.... the sound of the countdown.
*Geass activates
Lelouch: You can hear it. The sound of ticking...
*Sound of ticking*
Stupid-looking henchman: N-no way...!
*Sound of ticking continues*
Stupid-looking henchman: Impossible! For real!? ...I can hear it!
Kallen: Eh!? ...But I don't hear anything?
Stupid-looking henchman: S-stop! Don't come any closer!
Lelouch: 10 seconds to Zero Hour.
Stupid-looking henchman: No! Stop!! I don't wanna dieeeeee!!
Lelouch: Three, two, one...
Stupid-looking henchman: Herk--
*Suzaku attacks the robber; gun goes flying, robber is out*
Kallen: *surprised*
Suzaku: Kallen! Are you alright?
Kallen: Ah... yes! Suzaku, when did you circle round behind us?
Suzaku: It was easy with Lelouch drawing his attention. Can you stand?
Kallen: Th-than...
*Sound of gunshot*
Pompous boss: I thought I told all of you to stay put!
Lelouch: Oh? I didn't think you were such a fast worker. You were back before the calculated time.
Pompous boss: Shut your trap! Can't you see this rifle here?
Suzaku: Surrender. If you do it now we can still put in a good word and your crime won't be as serious.
Kallen: Suzaku, you can't reason wi--
Suzaku: Don't worry, leave it to me. *Suzaku approaches robber* Come, put down your gun.
Pompous boss: Stop right there!
Suzaku: It's no use.
Pompous boss: Looks like it won't get through your thick skulls if no one gets hurt. In that case--!!
*Sound of gunshot*
Pompous boss: *surprised sound*
Kallen: He-- dodged the bullet!!
*Suzaku attacks the robber; rifle goes flying, robber is down*
Suzaku: I am Kururugi Suzaku, Warrant Officer in the service of the Britannian Empire Army. I now detain the both of you on the grounds of bank robbery as well as attempted murder.
Pompous boss: I-impossible... ugh...
Suzaku: As long as there aren't any hostages, guns are nothing to be afraid of.
Lelouch: Hmph.. the third reason -- the fact that Kururugi Suzaku is here.
*Scene change; sound of sirens*
Kallen: U-um... thanks... for saving me.
Suzaku: You did well there, Kallen. ...Still, telling the robber off like that...
Lelouch: Yeah, even though you're a sickly princess and all.
Kallen: Eh? ...Th-that was... it just came out...
Suzaku: Kallen, you alright?
Lelouch: Are you alright? Doing absurd things like that against an armed opponent--
Suzaku: I could say the same about you. That bluff was just too reckless. What were you planning on doing if I hadn't circled round to the back?
Kallen: Eh? The both of you didn't discuss things over beforehand?
Lelouch: Not at all.
Suzaku: Lelouch just started acting on his own.
Kallen: And still it worked out... *disbelief*
Lelouch: Because Suzaku was there.
Suzaku: Thanks for trusting me. Your third reason was wrong, though.
Lelouch: Me? Wrong?
Suzaku: That's right. It wasn't because I was there. It was because we were there, Lelouch.
I always say if I've ever seen a serious anime do crack right and spectacularly and in ways that make WTF nowhere near accurate enough, it's Geass. The Newtype special gives us some rare quality time between Lelouch, Suzaku and Kallen. Seriously these three need to spend more time together for it is hilarious. Lelouch and Suzaku are still stupid for each other, Lelouch more so with his not quite hero worship. Lelouch in general wins the award in this one for sounding most ridiculous, but he makes up for it with some unrivaled Kallen taunting. She really needs to kick him in the balls one of these days. And hey I admit it, as manic as this thing was, the end did get its obligatory AWWWW. Also, Lelouch going "Me? Wrong?" is so damn arrogant; I'm dying here. XD
Moral of this special: Fuck you, Neo. We all know Suzaku is THE ONE!
Sound Episode NewType Special -- The Third Reason
*Translations by Celiss at GameFAQs.*
For clarification, italicized sentences in Lelouch's parts signify internal monologue.
*Gunshot; shrieks*
Bank Robber A: Don't anybody move!
Bank Robber B: Everyone put your hands on your head and get down on the floor.
Bank Robber A: Do as you're told or else!
Lelouch: Tawdry bank robbers, straight out of an unimaginative drawing. Normally this is where I snort and turn off the TV, but not this time. Why, you ask? Well...
Kallen: *girly shriek*
Suzaku: Kallen!!
*Bank robber removes the safety on the gun*
Bank Robber A: Any of you try anything funny and I'll put a hole through the girlie's head!
Lelouch: This is all real, and we're part of it.
Bank Robber B: Looks like they understand we mean business. Don't worry, it'll all be over soon -- if you'll just be smart and do what's in your best interests.
Lelouch: There are two criminals. The pompous one happens to be the boss and has a rifle. The stupid-looking henchman has a pistol and now has Kallen under custody. Nothing I can't handle by using the Geass -- my power to order anyone and everyone -- but to do it without either Suzaku or Kallen realizing may prove to be difficult...
Pompous boss: I'll head to the vaults in the back. Watch the hostages.
Stupid-looking henchman: Got it, Boss.
Lelouch: Shall I contact the Black Knights...? If I remember correctly, there should be an armed *cell in area D7. Not the most elegant of methods, but...
(T/N: *Cell is the the official term used for subdivisions of the Black Knights)
Suzaku: Stop! Let go of her!
Kallen: Suzaku!?
Lelouch: ...You idiot!
Suzaku: I'll be your hostage. She's weak, she isn't up to this.
Lelouch: Oh no, I think she's fairly tough.
Suzaku: Aren't you ashamed of yourself, holding a lady hostage?
Stupid-looking henchman: Oh? You're an Eleven. If you're Japanese, lend us a hand! Them Buriki bastards got their money by exploiting us!
Suzaku: Even so, that doesn't justify a bank robbery!
Stupid-looking henchman: Shut up! We have the Black Knights backing us!
Suzaku: Eh!?
Lelouch: Oh? The Black Knights, huh.
Kallen: Don't be absurd. The Black Knights are different from the likes of you!
Stupid-looking henchman: What you say!?
Kallen: Taking a woman hostage... The Black Knights-- Zero would never do such a thing!
(T/N: Too bad -- He did in episode 19. Though I suppose Kallen was happy then because it looked like he did it to have her back)
Stupid-looking henchman: Shut up, *Buriki whore!!
(T/N: He doesn't actually use the term "whore" -- he uses the term "woman" in an insulting way)
*Kallen gets hit*
Kallen: *girly shriek #2*
Suzaku: Kallen!!
Lelouch: Oh dear. I guess it can't be helped.
*Lelouch gets up*
Suzaku: Lelouch...?
Stupid-looking henchman: Oi, that student there, don't get up without my orders!
Lelouch: Shut up. I'm the one giving the orders here.
*Sound of footsteps*
Stupid-looking henchman: Stay where you are! Any nearer and I shoot the girl!
Lelouch: As you wish. It's not like that *woman is my girlfriend or anything.
Kallen: Wha---!? *low hiss* Le~louch!!
Stupid-looking henchman: Are you stupid? I can shoot you, too.
Lelouch: There are three reasons for your downfall.
Stupid-looking henchman: HAH?
Lelouch: The first reason -- believing that that woman has any real worth as a hostage.
Kallen: *angry noise*
Lelouch: The second -- somehow getting it in your heads that you are the only ones with weapons.
Stupid-looking henchman: Hah? Ain't no way a student's got a weapon on him.
Lelouch: Is that so? What if we both came here for the exact same reason?
Stupid-looking henchman: Wha--
Lelouch: Go on, shoot me -- if you'd like to experience first-hand the power of the C4-type plastic bomb I have in my pocket, that is.
Stupid-looking henchman: Th-that's a bluff!
Lelouch: Then I dare you to search my pocket.
Stupid-looking henchman: S-stay where you are! Come any nearer and I shoot!
Lelouch: I just thought I'd let you hear it for yourself... the ticking of the timer on the bomb.
Stupid-looking henchman: What!?
Lelouch: You should be able to hear it any second now.... the sound of the countdown.
*Geass activates
Lelouch: You can hear it. The sound of ticking...
*Sound of ticking*
Stupid-looking henchman: N-no way...!
*Sound of ticking continues*
Stupid-looking henchman: Impossible! For real!? ...I can hear it!
Kallen: Eh!? ...But I don't hear anything?
Stupid-looking henchman: S-stop! Don't come any closer!
Lelouch: 10 seconds to Zero Hour.
Stupid-looking henchman: No! Stop!! I don't wanna dieeeeee!!
Lelouch: Three, two, one...
Stupid-looking henchman: Herk--
*Suzaku attacks the robber; gun goes flying, robber is out*
Kallen: *surprised*
Suzaku: Kallen! Are you alright?
Kallen: Ah... yes! Suzaku, when did you circle round behind us?
Suzaku: It was easy with Lelouch drawing his attention. Can you stand?
Kallen: Th-than...
*Sound of gunshot*
Pompous boss: I thought I told all of you to stay put!
Lelouch: Oh? I didn't think you were such a fast worker. You were back before the calculated time.
Pompous boss: Shut your trap! Can't you see this rifle here?
Suzaku: Surrender. If you do it now we can still put in a good word and your crime won't be as serious.
Kallen: Suzaku, you can't reason wi--
Suzaku: Don't worry, leave it to me. *Suzaku approaches robber* Come, put down your gun.
Pompous boss: Stop right there!
Suzaku: It's no use.
Pompous boss: Looks like it won't get through your thick skulls if no one gets hurt. In that case--!!
*Sound of gunshot*
Pompous boss: *surprised sound*
Kallen: He-- dodged the bullet!!
*Suzaku attacks the robber; rifle goes flying, robber is down*
Suzaku: I am Kururugi Suzaku, Warrant Officer in the service of the Britannian Empire Army. I now detain the both of you on the grounds of bank robbery as well as attempted murder.
Pompous boss: I-impossible... ugh...
Suzaku: As long as there aren't any hostages, guns are nothing to be afraid of.
Lelouch: Hmph.. the third reason -- the fact that Kururugi Suzaku is here.
*Scene change; sound of sirens*
Kallen: U-um... thanks... for saving me.
Suzaku: You did well there, Kallen. ...Still, telling the robber off like that...
Lelouch: Yeah, even though you're a sickly princess and all.
Kallen: Eh? ...Th-that was... it just came out...
Suzaku: Kallen, you alright?
Lelouch: Are you alright? Doing absurd things like that against an armed opponent--
Suzaku: I could say the same about you. That bluff was just too reckless. What were you planning on doing if I hadn't circled round to the back?
Kallen: Eh? The both of you didn't discuss things over beforehand?
Lelouch: Not at all.
Suzaku: Lelouch just started acting on his own.
Kallen: And still it worked out... *disbelief*
Lelouch: Because Suzaku was there.
Suzaku: Thanks for trusting me. Your third reason was wrong, though.
Lelouch: Me? Wrong?
Suzaku: That's right. It wasn't because I was there. It was because we were there, Lelouch.