thekingsgambit: (stepping so lightly)
[personal profile] thekingsgambit
[Sometime after speaking with Cornelia and checking on Nunnally, who is still in a deep sleep from the other day, Lelouch heads toward his room to retrieve the piece of paper with the notes he had once taken from Muraki's book in regards to medications to help with sleep.]

Date: 2011-02-11 04:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Turns to Suzaku slowly, trying to comprehend the impossibility of what he is telling him, eyes widening and breath growing still.]

Date: 2011-02-11 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[Doesn't meet his gaze, focusing on a point in the distance, his voice flat]

She asked me how I could do it, and I couldn't deny it.

Date: 2011-02-11 04:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
How you could...

[Voice trails off, instantly realizing what Suzaku is not saying, why he's not facing him. Zero Requiem. Nunnally, she knew what they had done. More than just the massacres and the imprisonments. The choreography of the Demon King's death and Zero's triumphant moment as hero of the people. Only she knew what he laid behind both those masks. He had never realized... She isn't just reeling from his death but from the knowledge that he had forced his best friend, their best friend, to commit the act. She knew the truth about the knight that had stayed by her side for months here and played at their childhood friendship with her brother. She told him he lied to her... Ah, he had lied.]

Date: 2011-02-11 05:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[Finally brings himself to look over at Lelouch as he hears the realization dawn in the other's voice.]

...sorry.

Date: 2011-02-11 05:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
Why - Why are you apologizing?

[He can barely find the words amid the onslaught of shock. A tremble has started at his shoulders and is now noticeable in his voice.]

Date: 2011-02-11 05:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[The tremble snaps Suzaku back to the present moment, as he carefully composes himself again. He shakes his head]

Because I know you don't want her to know. But she deserved the truth after everything.

Date: 2011-02-11 05:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
I... do not intend to lie to her ever again, Suzaku.

[Pause.]

... Will she still let you stay with her?

Date: 2011-02-11 05:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
She was upset with me, but that's to be expected. I thought she would be a lot angrier than she was. She didn't tell me to go away.

Date: 2011-02-11 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Gives a relieved sigh, though still incredibly tense. He rubs at one of his arms]

... Ah, that's good.

Nunnally does not want to be alone right now, even with what happened.

Date: 2011-02-12 02:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
I considered staying away from her, to lessen the pain she will have to go through when she loses me again...

Date: 2011-02-12 02:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
I think it's her choice whether she wants to be with you. But I don't think you should stay away from her just because she's going to lose you again.

Date: 2011-02-12 03:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
I know. Cornelia made me realize the same thing, although she had a more difficult time of it. I have no intention of humoring the thought further.

Date: 2011-02-12 03:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
Good. Because I don't know how much I should be around, in any case.

Date: 2011-02-12 04:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
No, you cannot have her see your as avoidant. She will need you later, and she still needs to be able to believe you care about it and, more importantly, that she can trust you. This is not about our pain, Suzaku. This about correcting our mistake.

Date: 2011-02-12 04:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
No, it's not about my pain.

[Shoves a hand through his hair as he considers the rest of the reasoning]

All right. Fine.

Date: 2011-02-12 04:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Watches him do that, as he considers something else that has occurred to him since the night he spent at his little sister's side. The resolute look on his face falters ever so slightly, as he swallows.]

Date: 2011-02-12 05:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Speaking evenly, as he regards Suzaku with sober eyes.]

... Nunnally should not be given any reason to believe that anything, or anyone, challenges her importance here. She must be first.

Date: 2011-02-12 05:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[Sighs heavily]

And you call me the idiot.

Date: 2011-02-12 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Clenches his fist at his side, his arm shaking.]

What would you have me do, Suzaku? In her eyes, our alliance is against her. Do you want to risk reminding her of that?

Date: 2011-02-12 05:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[Moves forward and grabs his collar!]

Alliance? Does she even think that way? And if you think putting her above everything else fixes anything that happened, you're wrong.

Date: 2011-02-12 06:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
I cannot keep being selfish, Suzaku! I owe her too much.





I owe you too much.

Date: 2011-02-12 09:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whenknightfalls.livejournal.com
[Shoves him away]

If that's what it is, then you wouldn't make me do this.

Date: 2011-02-12 10:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thekingsgambit.livejournal.com
[Stumbles slightly on the shove and then forces his miserable look to steady enough to continue, voice low.]

Just this once, try not to make things more difficult than they are. She needs us right now.



... This doesn't change... anything. But she needs us, Suzaku. That is what matters.

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Lelouch vi Britannia

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